Home Blog Page 119

Vulgar anti-gay slur halts championship final soccer match – Washington Blade

SANTA CLARA, CA. – The San Francisco 49ers have announced month-long plans for the organization’s annual celebration of June LGBTQ+ Pride month. Led by 49ers PRIDE, the official fan club of 49ers Faithful who identify as LGBTQ+ and allies, the 2021 celebration will be highlighted by the 2021 49ers PRIDE Collection.

Every fan can feel seen

The San Francisco 49ers call their new retail line of rainbow-logo’d tops, tees and jackets “genderless.” We think you’ll call them cool- two years after the San Francisco 49ers led the NFL with the first official community for LGBTQ fans and allies, back in May 2019, the team hopes to score another win for its diverse fanbase Thursday with a new retail line that isn’t limited by binary gender styles.

The new array of team-branded and Pride-themed clothing is the league’s first and only “genderless” collection, according to a news release from the Niners. The threads are by Fanatics and the team promises 100% of the proceeds from this collection will benefit the San Francisco LGBT Center, the Oakland LGBT Center and The LGBTQ Youth Space: San Jose.

49ers Pride49ers Pride

“Supporting the LGBTQ+ community in sports is a priority for the 49ers organization because sport has not always been inviting,” the 49ers’ Hannah Gordon told the Los Angeles Blade. Gordon is entering her tenth season with the 49ers and third as chief administrative officer and general counsel.

49ers Pride49ers Pride

“We created 49ers PRIDE to make space for all of our LGBTQ+ fans and allies and it quickly became an incredible community. This year, we designed the first genderless retail line by an NFL team because we don’t want there to be 49ers fan who wants gear but doesn’t feel seen. If you want to support the Niners, we have something for you.”

There will still be items available that fans who prefer a feminine cut can purchase at the team’s online store, but the 2021 Pride collection is specifically geared toward Niners fans who aren’t interested in reinforcing gender stereotypes when they support their team and fly their Pride colors.

“With this line, we have pieces that were designed so that however you identify, you can find a fit and any two people can express different styles with the same piece,” said Gordon. “I love seeing how our fans wear these pieces and express their style. Doing it your own way is faithful to the Bay.”

Click here to view the collection and find out more about 49ers Pride.

Burger King trolls Chick-fil-A with LGBTQ+ donations – CNN

New York CNN Business —  

Burger King is making a statement during pride month: It’s trying to get a leg up in the chicken sandwich wars by taking a not-so-subtle dig at rival Chick-fil-A’s fraught history with the LGBTQ+ community.

The fast-food chain tweeted last week that it would donate 40 cents to the Human Rights Campaign for every Ch’King chicken sandwich sold in June. The Human Rights Campaign is America’s largest LGBTQ civil rights organization.

Burger King added it will make those donations “even on Sunday,” tweeting the eyes emoji. Chick-fil-A, because of its devout Christian ownership, closes its restaurants on Sundays.

Chick-fil-A and the LGBTQ+ community

Chick-fil-A CEO Dan Cathy said in 2012 that the company supports “the biblical definition of the family unit.” In a 2018 interview with a local Atlanta TV station, Cathy reiterated his position on same-sex marriage but said he’s not anti-gay.

The company has since tried to distance itself from its less-than-supportive stance toward the LGBTQ+ community.

For example, in 2019, Chick-fil-A made major changes to its charitable foundation, ending donations to two organizations that have been criticized for being anti-LGBTQ+ — the Salvation Army and the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Both organizations have taken controversial stands on homosexuality and same-sex marriage.

What’s Burger King up to?

Burger King's new Ch'King sandwich
Burger King
Burger King’s new Ch’King sandwich

Burger King is trying to make up ground in the chicken sandwich wars. Popeyes struck gold with its chicken sandwich in 2019, which sent customers flocking to the fast-food chain to get their hands (and mouths) on one.

Since then, the quick-serve restaurant industry has fallen over itself to get in on the fried chicken sandwich action.

Wendy’s (WEN), McDonald’s (MCD), KFC, Shake Shack (SHAK) and many other competitors have blown up their staid chicken sandwiches for new ones or developed additional flavorful menu items. Americans have been eating more chicken and less beef the last few years, and low-growth, low-margin, low-loyalty fast-food companies are desperate for any leg up over the competition.

Burger King first announced in February its new chicken sandwich, served on a potato bun with pickles and a savory sauce. To help distinguish the product, Burger King has since renamed the sandwich the “Ch’King” (it had originally been referred to as simply the hand-breaded crispy chicken sandwich).

Although Burger King is one of thousands of brands to celebrate Pride Month with deals, the timing happens to coincide with a previously announced Ch’King promotion: To raise awareness and drive sales, Burger King said last month it would give free Whoppers to any customers who order a Ch’King through Burger King’s website or app from June 3 until June 20.

– CNN Business’ Danielle Wiener-Bronner and Jordan Valinsky contributed to this report.

Mayor declares June ‘LGBT Pride Month’ in Bay City – MLive.com

BAY CITY, MI – The City of Bay City took a step during its first in-person meeting of 2021 to celebrate the area LGBT community.

Mayor Kathleen Newsham made a proclamation on Monday, June 7 declaring June as ‘LGBT Pride Month’ in Bay City.

Under the proclamation, Newsham is encouraging residents to celebrate with members of the local LGBT community.

Scott Ellis, executive director of the Great Lakes Bay Pride organization was in attendance to accept the proclamation.

“I want to thank the city commission, you mayor Newsham, the city manager’s office for all of the support and we’re excited to be celebrating pride here in Bay City and across the Great Lakes Bay Region all month and all year,” Ellis said.

Newsham’s proclamation referenced historical events in 1969 relating to the LGBT movement and how they have led to pride celebrations taking place around the country every June.

The proclamation states that a historic turning point occurred on June 28, 1969 with the onset of the Stonewall Riots, during which LGBT citizens fought against discriminatory laws that have since been declared unconstitutional.

“Our nation was founded on the principle of equal rights for all people, but the fulfillment of this promise has been long in coming for many Americans,” said Newsham, as she read from her proclamation.

Great Lakes Bay Pride is hosting its ‘Celebrate Pride at Home’ festival this month for the second year in a row due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

In previous years, the event has been held in person in Bay City and has included activities and elements in the past such as art, retail shopping, food, and resource vendors, and an after party drag show.

As a part of the at home event, the organization distributed yard signs earlier in June to the community for a donation to place in their yard. Pride nights were also hosted on June 4 at Larkin Beer Garden and at a Great Lakes Loon game in the Dow Diamond in Midland as a part of the event.

The event also involves a decorating contest where those who decorate a window, porch, entryway or other area in their home with a pride theme are able to post their photos on Facebook with #GreatLakesBayPride2021 to be entered into a random drawing at the end of June, according to Great Lakes Bay Pride.

The winner will receive a gift bag from the organization.

Click here for more information about the Celebrating Pride at Home event.

More from MLive:

Saginaw City Council approves resolution supporting nondiscrimination policies for the LGBTQ community

‘Bird Rides’ electric scooter sharing system coming to Bay City

Bay City Riverside Art Festival returning for 2021 with a focus on female artists

New zero-waste store in Midland aims to curb single-use plastic problem

Dan Kildee helps Bay County Habitat for Humanity build ramp for widow of Air Force veteran

UP: Queer group seeks funds for LGBT members – Times of India

LUCKNOW: Queer support group has started a fundraising campaign on social media, titled -‘Trans Community Fundraiser’, to raise help and provide financial assistance to the poor transgenders who have been affected severely by the pandemic yet again.
The money which will be raised will help in providing food and medical assistance to needy transgender people who are facing a shortage of funds. Members said that since the trans people earn their living through begging in buses, trains, religious ceremonies. In these absence of these sources of income due to lockdown and cancellation of events they cannot move out, resulting in major risk of financial crunch and ill-health.
The Queer Support Group is a group from LGBT community whose supporters have been regularly conducting meetings and events to build solidarity. “The group has raised Rs 1,52,692 and aims for more,” said Aditya Vikram who created the campaign on the crowdfunding platform Milaap.

Colin Sheridan: The press and sport stars – as long as both exist, one will need the other – Irish Examiner

– From The Loser, by Gay Talese 

My brother tells a story almost forgotten to me until all the noise surrounding Naomi Osaka’s distinct lack of noise in Paris last week.

In the tragic aftermath of Mayo’s All-Ireland final loss to Meath in 1996, he emerged from the showers in Croke Park an emotionally broken man, to his place in the dressing room, a stage now strewn with the debris of butchered dreams. His towel, moments before perched on a bench, had fallen foul of the stampeding press, who had surrounded his teammate, the crestfallen giant Liam McHale.

Dictaphones at the ready, so rabid for soundbites from Mayo’s spiritual totem, they were oblivious to the truths around them. McHale, infamously sent off in a brawl that afternoon, did his best to muster words, while my (naked) brother did his best to dislodge his only towel from under the feet of the Ireland’s best sportswriters. He yanked so hard at one stage, his efforts drew a verbal rebuke from one of the group’s more established members.

Demoralised and defeated for the second time that fabled afternoon, he took his scolding, sat and waited, his crisp blue shirt off the hanger, now on his lap, saving his blushes.

As a teenager, this story mattered to me. It also had me slightly conflicted. Growing up, my heroes were not only those on the field — like my brother — but those thrusting the dictaphones underneath McHale’s chin, standing on my brother’s towel. Monday was just as important as Sunday. I loved the games but arguably loved reading about them more.

The absurdity of the dressing room scene sounds like an outtake from an Enda Walsh play (A Towel, in Two Acts), but, in the context of the Osaka case, is easily imaginable. Jobs had to be done. Deadlines met. Words written. Tragedies told. Towel or no towel.

Naomi Osaka: Withdrew from the French Open. Picture; Jon Bromley
Naomi Osaka: Withdrew from the French Open. Picture; Jon Bromley

A little under 12 months later, I was in Deer Park in Dublin, fulfilling my brotherly duty of football retrieval during a placekicking session. My role may have seemed inconsequential to the naked eye, but I knew its importance. You didn’t just collect the balls and kick them back out, you collected them and had to understand exactly where the next series of kicks would be taken from.

So, your delivery was quite important. These were not leisurely, carefree evenings spent gazing at cloudless skies. It was serious business. We were trying to win All-Irelands. Besides, I felt privileged in having a ringside seat to a certain kind of greatness.

This night was different to me, though, and not because it was in the build-up to an All-Ireland final with Kerry. I was used to that pressure. No, the difference was there was a third party joining us, Vincent Hogan of the Irish Independent, who would interview him for a finals preview. To Vincent and to my brother, this was just another act in the play, an accepted part of the silent contract between sportsman and journalist. Both went about their business.

I kept my distance but my nerves were frayed, I was snap-hooking deliveries I’d usually land in a phonebox. The journo, by his presence alone, had iced me. Thank God, I guess, it wasn’t me playing for Mayo. It was a morsel of a modicum of a sliver of a glimpse into the stresses of my brother’s world, and by extravagant extension, the world of Naomi Osaka.

Today, I feel I’ve looked at love — to quote Joni Mitchel — from both sides now. I felt the pain of any critical word ever penned about my brother perhaps just as acutely as he did, yet, there are days, now, that I pass a Galway footballer in a coffee shop and feel a chill, suddenly aware of a quip I may have buried deep in a piece two years ago.

As writers of sport, we understand readers want blood in the dirt. Glory, sure, but the slippier the mask your heroes wear, the more truth it will reveal. We want to see them cry when they fail because we cry. We will then hate them for it, just as we often hate ourselves. The spectacle is never enough. Not only do we want to see the gladiator fight, we want them interviewed as they’re fed to the lions.

“Does it hurt Maximus? How much?”

Just because Lee Harvey Oswald got shot live on television doesn’t mean all assassinations should be televised.

Saturday night, millions watched as golfer Jon Rahm was told he had tested positive for Covid-19, live on TV. You know, the virus that’s killed nearly four million people in little over a year.

The moment occurred at the edge of the 18th green, after he had shot 64 and led the tournament by six shots. Rahm’s towel was on the ground. The world stood on it.

Who to blame? Hemmingway? Updike? Mailer? Plimpton? Wright Thompson?

Many of them became more famous than their subjects. They became myth creators and kingmakers extraordinaire, and in doing so, produced some of the best nonfiction of the last century. In an infamous profile of the boxer, Floyd Patterson, called The Loser, Patterson told writer Gay Talese how he used to keep a fake beard, moustache, spare hat and glasses stashed in his kit bag, and how, when he lost to Sonny Liston in a first-round knockout, he put the disguise on right after the fight and wore it all the way from Chicago to New York, where he went straight to the airport.

“I didn’t care what plane I boarded,” he said. “I just looked up and saw this sign at the terminal reading ‘Madrid’, and so I got on that flight after buying a ticket.”

For the next five days, Patterson pretended he was an old man with a limp. “I began to actually think I was somebody else,” he said. “And it is nice, every once in a while, being somebody else.” What incredible, relatable insight into a champion. What a shame it would’ve been had it never been written, and we would never have understood how utterly human he was.

There is nothing binary about the relationship between press and sports stars, only the black ink on the white page. It will be ever thus. As long as both exist, one will need the other. It behooves us all to at least not trample upon the towel in the telling of the story.

San Jose church that defied coronavirus orders draws protest by hosting anti-gay leader – San Francisco Chronicle

On the first weekend of Pride month, a group waved rainbow signs to protest San Jose’s Calvary Chapel and its guest speaker of the day: Tony Perkins, a notorious anti-gay activist.

The peaceful protest, which drew about 30 people Sunday morning, along with a small counterprotest, was deemed a success by co-organizer Ryan Stollar, a Los Gatos resident. He said protesters spoke to many congregants with the goal of highlighting Calvary’s promotion of extremist views.

“I think we surprised them and showed them we were willing to dialogue,” he said. “We were not there to hate on Christianity or hate on God.”

Tony Perkins is an ordained pastor, politician and current head of the national Family Research Council, which the Southern Poverty Law Center has named an anti-LGBT hate group. The organization fights gay rights like same-sex marriage and wants to bring back the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy.

More protests are likely to come in the future. Stollar and fellow organizers Taylor Storey and Carly Fox recently formed the Calvary Chapel Watch, with plans to hold demonstrations outside the other roughly dozen Bay Area Calvary Chapel locations on days when other far-right speakers appear in the coming months.

While people held signs with slogans like “Love is not a sin” and “Honk for gays” outside, Christian rock songs and sermons continued inside the San Jose church. Pastor Mike McClure’s introduced Perkins, by describing him as a man who “loves controversy.”

“The truth is we’re actually the protesters,” McClure said. “We’re protestants. We’re protesting for the gospel of Jesus Christ, so that’s what we’re here to do.”

In his opening remarks, Perkins said he would be speaking on God and not politics — but he did speak against face masks in the cotext of the coronavirus pandemic. The San Jose church has made headlines recently for violating public health orders by hosting large indoor gatherings during the pandemic.

Outside, Stollar and the protesters denounced the words of the Family Research Center: false claims that queer people are more likely to sexually abuse people or that gay men are more likely to be pedophiles.

“That sort of message is what creates harassment and abuse against queer people,” Stoller said. “We’re not trying to say Christianity is wrong. We’re trying to highlight that these far right organizations are spreading misinformation and lies about queer people.”

Janelle Bitker is a San Francisco Chronicle staff writer. Email: janelle.bitker@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @janellebitker

‘Boys’ Love’ dramas dance around China’s LGBTQ censors – The Japan Times

Two men exchange longing glances, a frisson of sexual tension in an on-screen relationship which must otherwise go unspoken — China’s “boys’ love” phenomenon is gripping video streamers, slipping by censors of LGBTQ themes with their subtlety.

The genre rose to prominence in 2018 as adaptations of web novels about same-sex couples, known as “dangaiju,” were increasingly picked up by on-demand services, propelling Chinese actors to stardom.

In “Word of Honor,” a blockbuster adventure from video platform Youku, two handsome martial arts heroes develop a close bond, but refer to each other only as “brothers” as the heavily insinuated romance between protagonists fails to emerge.

Although China decriminalized homosexuality in 1997, same-sex marriage is illegal and taboo surrounds LGBTQ issues.

The community is facing renewed pressure, with web content censored and depictions of gay romance in films banned.

Yet boys’ love adaptations are booming, screened by streaming giants such as Youku and Tencent Video, mostly fueled by demand from straight women and their growing interest in a more delicate form of masculinity.

Tickets for a “Word of Honor” themed concert in Suzhou sold out in seconds last month, as hundreds of thousands rushed for a spot.

The series quickly racked up millions of views after it was released in February, while Tencent Video reportedly made 156 million yuan ($24.1 million) from advance viewings of a similar show.

For video platforms in China’s boisterous, hypercompetitive streaming sphere, changing social mores means one thing: money.

“In pop culture, creators look to subcultures for new stories or original material,” said Liaoning University lecturer Bai Meijiadai, an expert in fan culture.

“The rise of boys’ love content suggests the on-screen industry is aware of young women’s consumption power.”

The red pen of the state may have supported the video phenomenon.

Authorities have cracked down on “illegal” writing on the web, censoring content deemed too risque for Chinese readers. In 2018 a novelist was sentenced to 10 years in jail for writing and selling “pornographic” books.

“Sexual content in (same-sex) web novels has reduced since authorities embarked on cyberspace cleanups and platforms introduced review-and-report mechanisms,” said Bai.

This makes their story lines — many of grand, period adventures flecked with martial arts — easier to adapt for television, with more sexually explicit content removed, she added.

Around 60 TV adaptations are now under way.

But the genre attracts mixed reviews among China’s queer communities.

“They break the mold of heterosexual relationships being the norm on screen,” said a gay civil society worker who wanted to be known only as Shuai.

“But they do not reflect the LGBT community’s struggles and difficulties.”

Once lead actors attain fame, they also avoid suggestions of gay identity to maintain popularity, he added, doing little to counter the airbrushing out of LGBTQ lives.

The television adaptations mainly appeal to women.

An e-commerce worker surnamed Xu said boys’ love allowed her a precious escape, unlike many other TV shows in China which serve a barrage of stereotypes in their depictions of women’s gender roles.

“It allows me to think about fewer things and relax,” the 29-year-old added.

Handsome, boyish young men, including those from the TV serials, have also become a preferred fantasy love interest.

“That’s been influenced by boy band success from South Korea, Japan, Taiwan, since even the 1980s,” said Derek Hird, a senior lecturer in Chinese Studies at Lancaster University.

To surf the wave of popularity, more people — mostly amateur scribes — are writing boys’ love stories for the web in the hope they may be adapted for TV.

While authors are mostly part-timers who write for extra cash, “popular writers can earn more than 10,000 yuan a month via subscriptions and rewards from readers,” said a fiction editor who gave her name only as Chu.

Up to 40 million yuan was paid for rights to a novel in the genre, official periodical Banyuetan said.

Experts say the genre could prove useful to China’s soft power ambitions.

The country so far lacks a breakout entertainment product matching the global popularity of South Korea’s entertainment industry or Japan’s anime and manga.

Martial arts and period dramas are “really marketable aspects for China,” said Hird.

But there is tension between explorations on gender and the “fear of a masculinity crisis,” he added.

In January, China’s education ministry pledged to improve physical education and “pay more attention to cultivating” masculinity.

For now, the boys’ love industry has steered clear of regulators through subtle portrayals of same-sex moments or “normalizing” shows’ endings.

“For example, you may have deviations in your teenage years, but once you grow up, you still go back to reproductive ‘normalcy,’” explained Bai of Liaoning University.

In a time of both misinformation and too much information, quality journalism is more crucial than ever.
By subscribing, you can help us get the story right.

SUBSCRIBE NOW

PHOTO GALLERY (CLICK TO ENLARGE)

Station 19 star Danielle Savre donates eggs to help gay best friend have baby via surrogate – Daily Mail

She stars as bisexual fire captain character Maya Bishop on ABC’s Station 19.

And in real life, Danielle Savre is helping her best friend and his husband start a family.

The actress, 32, donated her eggs for pal Chris Ogden-Harkins and husband Jacob to use for surrogacy and now the couple are expecting a baby girl. 

Big gift: Actress Danielle Savre, 30, told LA news station ABC7 that she donated eggs for her best friend and his husband to use for surrogacy and the couple are now expecting a baby girl

Big gift: Actress Danielle Savre, 30, told LA news station ABC7 that she donated eggs for her best friend and his husband to use for surrogacy and the couple are now expecting a baby girl

‘We will be having a baby this November,’ Savre shared in an interview with local TV station ABC7 in Los Angeles. ‘This family is about to get bigger!’

Chris and Jacob are so excited about becoming dads that they’ve already named their daughter Aspen Grey and established an Instagram page for her.

Chris told ABC7 that Savre has ‘been so open, so willing to let us share, and be excited about our journey. And letting people know who are wanting to start a journey of their own, you can do it in many different ways.’

Savre herself explained: ‘I think we’re hoping this makes people less scared about approaching this.’ 

Exciting news: 'We will be having a baby this November,' Savre said as she was interviewed along with pal Chris Ogden-Harkins and husband Jacob. 'This family is about to get bigger!'

Exciting news: ‘We will be having a baby this November,’ Savre said as she was interviewed along with pal Chris Ogden-Harkins and husband Jacob. ‘This family is about to get bigger!’

TV role: Savre is best known for starring as fire captain Maya Bishop on ABC's Grey's Anatomy spin-off Station 19

TV role: Savre is best known for starring as fire captain Maya Bishop on ABC’s Grey’s Anatomy spin-off Station 19

Meanwhile, Savre’s character closed out the season 4 finale of Station 19 by tying the knot with girlfriend Dr. Carina DeLuca, played by Stefania Spampinato. 

Back in October 2018, the actress revealed she felt ‘honored to play a bisexual character’ on the Grey’s Anatomy spin-off.

‘I have a lot of friends that are part of the LGBTQ community and I have always taken pride in representing them in roles I have taken throughout the years,’ she explained in the Fall Issue of Retreat magazine.

‘I am very passionate about breaking certain stereotypes surrounding LGBTQ characters and advocating ways to diversify the stories that are being told,’ she said.

On screen gay marriage: Savre's character closed out the season 4 finale of Station 19 by tying the knot with girlfriend Dr. Carina DeLuca, played by Stefania Spampinato

On screen gay marriage: Savre’s character closed out the season 4 finale of Station 19 by tying the knot with girlfriend Dr. Carina DeLuca, played by Stefania Spampinato

Advocate: 'I have a lot of friends that are part of the LGBTQ community and I have always taken pride in representing them in roles I have taken throughout the years,' she explained in 2018

Advocate: ‘I have a lot of friends that are part of the LGBTQ community and I have always taken pride in representing them in roles I have taken throughout the years,’ she explained in 2018

‘Celebrating the beautiful spectrum of your souls’: Hundreds march for pride in Salt Lake City – KSL.com

SALT LAKE CITY — The state Capitol transformed into a sea of rainbow on Sunday as hundreds gathered to march, celebrate and commemorate Pride Month.

The event — organized by the Utah Pride Center — began with a rally on the steps of the state Capitol before attendees marched through the streets of downtown Salt Lake City.

Dozens of attendees carried a 200-foot pride flag through the streets as they marched underneath rainbow-colored balloon arches set up along State Street. As the march concluded in Liberty Park, the balloon arches were joined together to create one massive arch with over 1,000 balloons.

“We are celebrating the beautiful spectrum of your souls,” Salt Lake City Mayor Erin Mendenhall told the crowd before the march began. She said Pride Month is a time when “we celebrate the diversity and the beauty that makes us who we are.”

Mendenhall also said Salt Lake City would not have its identity as a leader in the state and the region in progressive communities, love and diversity without its members of the LGBTQ community.

After a year of being apart due to the pandemic, coming together to celebrate was especially important for many attendees.

“I started questioning last year right as COVID hit and so I didn’t really have like anyone hardly to talk to about it,” said attendee Hallie Allan, who wore a yellow and purple flag representing the nonbinary community around their neck. “Last year I didn’t get to do pride like this, so I’m happy that I can do it this year.”

“I just barely moved up here and I’m here with my beautiful partner to show support,” added Aidan Funai, Allan’s partner.

“We love coming out and supporting the community. It’s been so hard lately with everything going on,” said attendee Jerek Clark, referencing COVID-19 and the 2020 election.

“I feel like the political situation is still bad but I have a lot more faith that things can change,” Clark said. “I’ve been in the queer community for a decade and … it’s like home.”

Ann Clark, Jerek Clark’s mother who attended with him, noted that she volunteered at the Utah Pride Center for seven years and often brought her child with her.

“It’s where all our friends are,” she said.

Individuals hold up signs during the Rainbow March along State Street and 900 South headed to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021.
Individuals hold up signs during the Rainbow March along State Street and 900 South headed to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. (Photo: Annie Barker, Deseret News)

“What brought me out here is inclusion,” said Love Richardson, an attendee and indigenous tribal leader for the Nipmuc Nation. “I also came here because I wanted to be happy, and I knew I would be by coming here.”

Richardson came as an ally for Native American people who identify as “Two-spirit,” which is an umbrella term for an ancient identity of indigenous people who identify as having both masculine and feminine spirits.

Participants carry balloons spelling out the word “Pride” during the Rainbow March and Rally that began at the state Capitol before heading to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. The event was part of Pride Week activities to support Utah's LGBTQ community.
Participants carry balloons spelling out the word “Pride” during the Rainbow March and Rally that began at the state Capitol before heading to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. The event was part of Pride Week activities to support Utah’s LGBTQ community. (Photo: Annie Barker, Deseret News)

Richardson wore a traditional skirt with the symbol of her tribe on its front and colorful stitching of two dancing figures, which she said represent Richardson and her bisexual daughter.

“As an indigenous person, the Two-spirit have always had a place in our indigenous society. They were special, they were powerful, the two-spirited,” said Maurice “Mo” Smith, executive director of the Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake and a speaker at the event.

Current Utah politics also became a flashpoint as various speakers discussed recent changes regarding transgender policies.

Mendenhall referenced the announcement earlier this week that transgender sex reassignment surgery and health care coverage will be extended to all city employees, calling it “a proud moment.”

Taking aim at recent state legislation to ban transgender girls from sports, state Sen. Derek Kitchen, D-Salt Lake City and who is openly gay, said in his speech: “We belong at work, in church, at the grocery store, and yes, even in sports.”

The first iteration of the bill was approved by the Utah Legislature in early 2021 but was not supported by Gov. Spencer Cox, who argued the legislation needed to address the concerns of the LGBTQ community and the mental health of transgender students.

“Aug. 17, 2016, I was denied my request for a gender marker change — and a short few months later, so was my dear friend, Angie Rice,” Sean Childers-Gray, president of Ogden Pride, said in his speech. “On May 6, 2021, just 30 days ago, the answer came that all of us, all of Utah — we won!”

Childers-Gray and Angie Rice took their cases to the Utah Supreme Court, where they succeeded in their petition to allow transgender Utahns to amend their birth certificates, driver’s licenses and other state records to reflect the gender with which they identify.

Many attendees carried blue, pink and white striped flags to show support for the transgender community, while others painted the colors onto their bodies.

Speakers also reflected on the past, present and future of the LGBTQ community.

Two fathers walk with their child during the Rainbow March along State Street and 900 South headed to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021.
Two fathers walk with their child during the Rainbow March along State Street and 900 South headed to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. (Photo: Annie Barker, Deseret News)

Smith began the rally with a statement acknowledging Utah as the ancestral home of eight indigenous nations.

“Now we need to recognize … that the government, the academia and the institutions we are founded upon continue to enact exclusions and erase indigenous people’s traditional homelands, as well as equal rights of the LGBTQ community,” Smith said.

Childers-Gray reflected on the Stonewall riots of 1969 — a standoff between police and gay rights activists outside of a gay bar in New York City which is considered the birth of the international gay rights movement.

“Though our community continues to be attacked, trans women and trans women of color were always throwing the bricks of revolution,” Childers-Gray said.

Two individuals pause briefly to take a selfie during the Rainbow March and Rally that began at the state Capitol before heading to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. The event was part of Pride Week activities to support Utah's LGBTQ community.
Two individuals pause briefly to take a selfie during the Rainbow March and Rally that began at the state Capitol before heading to Liberty Park in Salt Lake City on Sunday, June 6, 2021. The event was part of Pride Week activities to support Utah’s LGBTQ community. (Photo: Annie Barker, Deseret News)

“We stand on broad, powerful shoulders of queer people that came before us and did the hard work,” Kitchen added. “Let’s not forget that that’s why we’re here today.”

Activists from Northern Utah Black Lives Matter and the Asian American and Pacific Islander community also discussed the importance of pride in relation to Juneteenth — when African Americans celebrate freedom from slavery — and amid the recent uptick in hate crimes against Asian Americans.

“We won’t stop marching until justice, equality and belonging are afforded to every one of us!” Kitchen said.

Mendenhall concluded: “Hate has no place in the city, it has no place in this community, it has no place in this state.”

Photos

Related Stories

More stories you may be interested in

Pride Month: How far the LGBTQ movement has come and what needs to be done – Spectrum News 1

​This year’s Pride Month commemorates the 51st anniversary of the Stonewall Uprising in New York City, which was the catalyst of the gay rights movement in the United States.

In this week’s “In Focus SoCal,” host Tanya McRae sits down with Rep. Mark Takano to talk about the Equality Act and anti-transgender bills that have been passed or being reviewed in various states.

“Discrimination is not just about your feelings getting hurt, discrimination means a loss of opportunity and inability to play sports and inability to get the information you need in order to have your medical needs taken care of,” said Takano.

Takano, the first openly gay Asian American to serve in Congress, is working on creating a commission to investigate the historic and ongoing impacts of discriminatory military policies and practices on LGBTQ servicemembers and veterans. ​

Palm Springs Mayor Pro Tem Lisa Middleton also joined the conversation to share the top issues that LGBTQ seniors face.

“LGBTQ seniors, particularly gay men and transgender people, are more likely to end up in their senior years without a partner, and with frequently, very strained family relationships,” said Middleton.

Middleton, who is transgender and was part of the nation’s first all-LGBTQ City Council, shares why Palm Springs was named the world’s top destination for LGBTQ seniors.

McRae also heads to The LGBTQ Center Long Beach to meet Mariham Iskander, who manages the older adults programs. Mariham, who identifies as queer and pan-sexual, works with the elder community to ensure they have the resources they need.

Finally, McRae talks to the founder of the House of Awt, Sean/Milan Garcon who tells us about the history of the house and ballroom scene that’s become a safe place and creative community for Black and brown LGBTQ members.

Send us your thoughts to InFocusSocal@charter.com and watch at 9 a.m. and noon Sundays.

Opinion: The VA has illegally denied health care to thousands of veterans – The Virginian-Pilot

An estimated 400,000 former service members are at risk of wrongly being denied VA health care and other benefits, according to a 2020 study by OutVets, a group of LGBTQ+ military veterans. It showed that gay and lesbian veterans and victims of military sexual assault are disproportionately at risk. So are veterans who served in the Navy or Marines, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and those with post-traumatic stress disorder.

Best Gay Dating Sites: Top 7 LGBTQ+ Dating Apps of 2021 – Blog – The Island Now

Due to the recent pandemic, online dating websites have skyrocketed in popularity. However, finding love online may be difficult for some. Overall, the majority of people still continue to join dating apps.

This is especially true and more common if you are gay. According to a study, gay people are twice as likely to have used dating apps as straight men. As a result, many mainstream dating platforms have taken steps to become more inclusive, and new gay dating sites and apps are appearing regularly.

The stakes are higher, and the requirements are distinct for those who are gay. There has never been a more bizarre time to try to figure out gay dating websites. So, if you are gay and looking for love or sex or both, we have compiled a list of some of the best gay dating sites avaialble to assist you in your process of finding your match.

Top 7 Best Gay Dating Sites

  1. eHarmony – Overall Best Matching Algorithm For Long Term
  2. Adam4Adam – Runner Up
  3. MenNation – Best for Hookups
  4. FriendFinder-X – Best for Casual Dating
  5. BiCupid – Best For Bicurious People
  6. Grindr – Another Mainstream Hookup Site
  7. HER – Best Dating Site for Lesbians

#1. eHarmony – Overall Best Gay Dating Site

Overview

eHarmony is the best dating service for the LGBTQ Community that helps its members find the best, most serious match for them. The dating site can narrow down each person’s match to a smaller list of possible matches by using a compatibility matching system.

eHarmony has the potential to be one of the best gay dating websites for a long-term commitment. Because the layout is geolocation-based, you’ll be able to find your ideal guy in your area right away. It claims to be dedicated to figuring out what makes long-term relationships work among them. It is one of the best hookup websites of 2021 according to The Island Now.

Pros

  • Sturdy privacy and security
  • Assurance of customer satisfaction
  • Matching system that is simple to use
  • Personality test with 80 questions
  • Long-term relationships are ideal

Cons

  • Sign-up takes a long time

Features

Video Date

Video Date, as the name implies, allows you to meet people via video. This feature allows you to spend time getting to know a match from the comfort of your own home.

Questions

You can ask people automated questions to start or continue a conversation. Everyone can send questions, and there is no limit to the number of questions you can answer or give in a day.

What if? Feature

This is a paid feature that adds 30 additional matches to your preference list. This means you’ll get more matches, giving you more options.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of eHarmony

#2. Adam4Adam – Best Runner Up

Overview

When you think of gay dating or LGBTQ, one of the first websites that come to mind is Adam4Adam. This gay dating service has been around since 2003, and despite not being the first gay dating site, it now has over 10 million members in its matchmaking algorithm.

It will take you between 5 to 10 minutes to sign up for Adam4Adam, though you can save time by logging in with your Facebook or Google account. Thanks to revenue from advertisements, pay-per-view adult movies, donations, and other revenue-generating projects.

This gay dating website caters to a diverse demographic, accepting men from all walks of life. You are welcome to join whether you are gay, bisexual, metrosexual, etc. You can create an account on this gay dating website regardless of your age, ethnicity, or cultural background.

Pros

  • Easy-to-use modern interface 
  • A lot of features are available for free
  • Provides users with a plethora of filtering options
  • 60,000 active members
  • Active since 2003
  • Dedicated to gay men
  • App is available in a variety of languages
  • Both a mobile app and a mobile-optimized browser version are available

Cons

  • There are no security measures in place to ensure that all profiles are genuine
  • When compared to the website version, the app has fewer features
  • The design of the dating app is not particularly appealing, particularly to the younger generation

Features

Cams in Real-Time 

You can watch plenty of online members on their live streams or contact them to start video chatting with Adam4AdamLIVE, Adam4CAMS, and A4ALIVE. You must, however, create a separate account for each of these channels, and there is a fee to view all of the videos.

Shop Sex Toys 

Adam4Adam app also has an online store where gay men can purchase sex toys and other items.

The Underwear Club 

The Adam4Adam Monthly Underwear Club is a fun little activity in which Adam4Adam sends you designer underwear every month, starting at ten dollars for the first month.

Resources for Health 

Adam4Adam has compiled a handy list of registered health counselors on the site. There are also websites for STD questions, clinics, and testing websites, harm reduction for methamphetamine users, and various US helplines on the list.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Adam4Adam

#3. MenNation – Best for Hookups

Overview

MenNation is a gay singles website that caters to the needs of all gay men. It is the first gay online platform. As a result, there are more than a hundred million people from all over the world on its user base. Hence, you’ll be able to meet someone for casual dating or even long-term relationships.

There is a free version of the gay singles website as well as a paid subscription that includes a number of features commonly found on gay dating sites. They have a large number of active users, making them one of the best gay singles websites.

Unlike other sites, many of the members are in their fifties and sixties. This website is very accessible. Members are sharing explicit content with confidence. Hookups and a lot of sex are more important to them than serious relationships.

Pros

  • This website has a user-friendly interface for gay men
  • To create an account, users do not need to provide any personal information
  • MenNation can be used for both casual dating and long-term relationships
  • Many communication options are available for free
  • This online platform for gay men can be translated into ten different languages

Cons

  • You must pay for a premium membership to gain access to some features
  • There is no mobile version of this website
  • There are a lot of explicit materials in MenNation

Features

Blog 

Read other members’ blogs to learn more about the topics they cover. You can also write your own blog post, which you can share with others. 

Instant Messaging 

Use this feature instead of the traditional email format if you want to try something new and different. You can use this feature to send a live video or have a face-to-face conversation with another member.

Model Show and Chat – LIVE

The cost of a live model show is paid. However, there are some rules to follow and some minimum requirements to meet on this gay singles dating app before you can earn money. If you’d rather just watch than participate, you can give the models tips or buzz to help them earn money or points.

Top Fan

By bidding some points, you can become a top fan and be featured on a member’s profile. You’ll also get a special badge and a special highlight. Members can compete for the top fan spot on your profile.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of MenNation

#4. FriendFinder-X – Best for Casual Dating

Overview

Without a doubt, FriendFinder-X is a hookup website. It’s for people who want to have some fun with no strings attached, whether online or in person. Being on a website where people aren’t hiding or lying about their true intentions and orientation is incredibly refreshing.

Joining and browsing the website’s 90 million+ profiles is completely free, but some of the best, most titillating content requires a paid membership.

Not only was FriendFinder-X designed for straight people, but also for gay dating. It is a platform that allows anyone to connect with others who can fulfill their sexual fantasies and desires.

Pros

  • Users are engaged and eager to share information (very eager, sometimes) 
  • The time it takes to go from signup to chat is minimal. A live feed of “trending” members is available on the website
  • Profiles can be completely customized, including NSFW elements
  • The inclusion of LGBTQ options broadens the website’s appeal
  • There are many different search filters and sort options to choose from

Cons

  • You can search and look as a free member, but you’ll need to upgrade to a paid membership to get the most out of the website
  • Some adult videos and model chats are paid services

Features

Live Action

Live Action is a place where you can watch professional live models stream live video streams as well as broadcasts from verified members. The content of these live videos is erotic and X-rated.

Hot or Not

Hot or Not is a roulette-style matching game in which you must choose whether to click the ‘thumbs up’ or ‘X’ button after viewing a photo. Clicking the ‘thumbs up’ button sends a like to that member, whereas clicking the ‘X’ button moves you to the next profile.

Sex Academy

There are courses on various sex topics and how to have better sex in this section. Members with Gold Memberships are the only ones who can access these courses.

Contests

Every now and then, FriendFinder-X holds contests in which the entire FriendFinder-X community can participate. The members vote to determine the winners of these contests. Any member can enter, and the prizes are usually free Gold Membership subscriptions.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of FriendFinder-X

#5. BiCupid – Best Bisexual Hookup Website for Threesome

Overview

Now that more people are demanding equal love, there are a plethora of the best dating apps and sites dedicated to LGBTQ people. BiCupid, on the other hand, is unique in that it was one of the first bisexual dating sites.

BiCupid is a bisexual dating site with over a million members worldwide. It brought the world closer together by making free mobile apps available for iOS and Android users.

BiCupid’s active and engaged community is one of its greatest assets. BiCupid aims to be a lifestyle destination for its user base, even though it is primarily a dating service for singles, couples and groups. The user base blogs can be found in the website’s Community section, where users can share their life experiences and topics of interest with one another.

Pros

  • Users of iOS and Android can use it
  • Downloading this app is completely free
  • Mobile users have access to desktop features
  • Simple to use
  • More refined and upgraded appearance than the desktop version
  • “Spark” feature is available to members
  • Over 50,000 new members join every month around the world
  • LGBTQ friendly

Cons

  • Free membership is limited; for the best results, a Gold Membership is required

Features

Spark

The “Spark” feature, which is similar to the popular swipe-left-or-right feature, is also available on BiCupid. Look at one profile at a time and decide whether it’s a yes or no. The good news is that this feature is available to all members.

Bisexual Date Ideas

Bisexual Date Ideas is a fun way to engage the LGBTQ community by allowing members, both free and paid, to submit date ideas. BiCupid rewards active and helpful members with a bonus subscription.

Forums for Bisexuals

With its forums feature especially designed for LGBTQ people, BiCupid fosters an open and sharing community. It allows members to express their thoughts and ideas, ask questions, and simply interact with one another.

Reverse Matches

The reverse match, which is only available to subscribed members, is a list of all the members who might not be compatible with you. Your information—your lifestyle, preferences, and plans—will serve as the foundation for determining whether or not you are a good match.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of BiCupid

#6. Grindr – Best Location Based Online Dating Website for Queer People

Overview

Grindr is considered one of the world’s best gay singles dating app. It’s so well-known that even straight people have heard of it. Grindr is the best gay singles dating app that is used in over 200 countries around the world. This best gay singles dating app has established itself as the go-to dating app for hooking up and casual sex for gays.

Instead of swiping to match, you’ll be presented with a collage of people who are geographically close to you. There will be no doubt that a large number of men are waiting to speak with you. Grindr lacks the boundaries that other apps provide; most users who are just looking for a hookup will make it clear that they aren’t looking for small talk.

Pros

  • There are over 6 million users on the dating app
  • It is both free and well-known
  • The majority of users make their intentions clear
  • Within an hour, you’ll be able to find a date
  • In dangerous countries, the Equality Campaign advocates for the safety of LGBTQ Community

Cons

  • For those looking for a long-term relationship, this is not the place to be
  • It’s possible that the app will lag

Features

Favorite

Favorite is a feature that allows you to save new profiles that you find interesting and message them later. Users will not be aware that you’ve favorited them, unlike taps.

Taps

Taps are a great way to express interest in someone without having to initiate a conversation. If you get their attention, they may strike up a conversation with you.

Gaymojis

Gaymojis numbers in the thousands. They’re not on any other social media platform. Bring out your wildest ways to talk about dates, travel, fun times, how you’re feeling, guys (obviously), and more to spice up your game.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Grindr

#7. HER – Best Dating Site for LGBTQ+

Overview

HER calls itself the most popular lesbian and LGBTQ dating app. This app distinguishes itself from the competition by being designed by queer women for queer women, It’s like Grindr just lesbian version. It’s not just a dating app; it’s also a social media platform where members can update their status.

Instead of being a simple hookup app, HER app takes a more open approach, with the long-term goal of connecting queer women to their community. In the United States, HER now has over a million members.

Pros

  • Everything is free and unlimited when it comes to messaging
  • Geolocation user base matches 
  • It’s like Grindr, just lesbian version
  • There will be no unwanted men approaching you
  • Community events and niche groups

Cons

  • There are times when the app lags
  • To sign up, you’ll need a Facebook or Instagram account

Features

Events

The Feed can be used to view and post events. From music festivals to cookouts to concerts to comedy shows, the best lesbian events in your area are listed here. You will be able to meet and socialize with lesbians if you attend these events.

Meet

You’ll be shown a variety of profiles that match your age and distance preferences. You can choose to like or dismiss them by swiping left or right. You can message each other once you like or are friends with each other.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of HER

Factors Considered Before Choosing These Websites

  • Membership Fees

The majority of gay dating sites will try to entice you in by offering a ‘free membership.’ Unfortunately, this can be used to hide a variety of fees, and it’s a shame that such sites aren’t more transparent about their pricing.  Some sites are completely free, though these are few and far between. The same can be said for other aspects of the website. 

  • Sites for Gay People and Mainstream Spin-Offs

There are several gay dating sites that are essentially the same and have been translated from the mainstream to the gay dating market.  In our reviews, we’ve tried to provide readers with websites that are excellent, as well as gay dating sites that follow different codes of online conduct.

  • Customer Reviews

Customer Reviews play an important role in deciding what the website actually offers. It plays the role of social example and tells readers about the actual act of a website. 

Is the website easy to navigate? Is this something that can be done with an app? Even though younger users are more tech-savvy, no rule says gay people will not want to use a casual hookup website. As a result, the design, tools, layout, and other aspects of the website influenced its ranking on this list.

Must-Have Features in Gay Dating Sites

While there is a vast array of different websites available, there are a few key terms to keep in mind.

  • Member Profiles

Virtually every online gay dating site will have member profiles. A member’s profile is an online representation of that member. One of the first things you’ll be asked to do when you sign up for a website is create a profile. This includes your info, photos, answering questions, bio, etc. This information assists other members of the website in gaining the most accurate picture of you, your interests, and what you are looking for in a relationship. It also works in the opposite direction, introducing you to other members of the site.

  • Tools for Searching

The largest dating sites typically have tens of thousands of members. It can feel like looking for a needle in a haystack when looking for a potential partner. To help direct you to the kind of person you’re looking for, most sites feature their own search engines. Search tools make it possible to find only those profiles that match the things you’re looking for as efficiently as possible by specifying member variables such as age, hobbies, hair color, or any one of the criteria.

  • Instant Messaging (IM)

This is a feature that is becoming more widely available on websites and allows you to communicate in real-time. This makes communication more like a natural flow of conversation, in which messages are sent and received instantly rather than having to send and receive messages individually via email.

  • Video Chat

Members of an online dating site who have signed up for video chat can communicate using their webcams. This means that the people with whom they are conversing can see and hear them (and vice versa). It’s a fun way to meet new people, and the interactive aspect is a lot more fun than sending emails. However, you will need to have your own webcam.

  • Forums and Chat Rooms

Forums and chat rooms, which are alternative ways for people to interact, are frequently found on online dating sites. A forum is a collection of pre-existing topics, issues, or questions to which people can respond (or you can often start your own).  There are numerous forums dedicated to relationships, dating, and gay-interest issues, as well as more general forums unrelated to online gay dating.  Chat rooms work similarly, except that you are physically present in the chat room with other members and can communicate with them in real-time via text.

FAQs About Gay Dating Sites

Q. Is it Safe to Use Gay Dating Sites? 

You should always exercise caution when using any dating website. This is particularly true if you live in a homophobic area or are visiting a stranger’s home. Everyone should be a suspect!

Q. How to Stay Safe?

  • Use Caution When Giving Out Personal Information

When dating online or in person, be wary of anyone who seems to want a lot of personal information from you right away. Don’t give out personal information like your address, birth date, or financial information.

  • Make Plans To Meet In A Public Area

Never meet someone for the first time at their home or invite them to yours, even if they claim to make the best pasta in town. Arrange to meet in a busy, public location, such as a restaurant or a coffee shop where you feel at ease.

  • Inform A Friend 

If you’re meeting an online date for the first time, make sure you tell a friend or family member who you’ll be meeting, when you’ll be meeting, and where you’ll be meeting.  If you have an iPhone, you can also use the app Find My Friends to share your location. During the date, check-in with a friend or ask them to call you at a specific time to see how you’re doing.

  • Don’t Be Afraid To Walk Away

Leave if your date is making you uncomfortable. It doesn’t matter if you’ve just sat down with them or if you’ve just finished a three-course meal with them. Walk away if they do or say anything that makes you feel uneasy. This person is a stranger, and you must first and foremost protect yourself.

  • You Must Travel There And Back On Your Own

If your date offers to pick you up from your home, decline politely. Plan your own route to and from your date so that you are always in complete control. This also means you won’t have to rely on someone else to tell you how long the date will last if you need to leave early.

Q. Why Should I Use a Site That Is Dedicated to the LGBTQ Community? 

For a variety of reasons, you should strongly consider using gay dating apps geared toward the LGBTQ community: 

  1. You won’t have to deal with those annoying straights. 
  2. It’s a safe place to express yourself without fear of being judged. 
  3. Gay dating apps cater to the needs of gay men.

Q. Are Gay Dating Sites Distinct from Regular Dating Sites? 

Gay dating sites are more likely to have features tailored to our specific needs as gays. For trans and non-binary people, it’s assisting them in remaining anonymous. Gay men can also sort men by type whether they’re looking for twinks, jocks, daddies, otters, or anything else.

Conclusion – Which Gay Dating Site Should You Choose?

This is it! These are the best gay dating sites for you. Finding the right gay dating site for you is no easy task, which is why we’ve put in the effort to help you out with our reviews.

All the websites mentioned above are good and will give you good results. Our overall winner of best gay dating sites are eHarmony & Adam4Adam, as they provide you with many free features. However, we wish you luck on your gay dating journey, no matter which gay dating site you choose!

My path to freedom: a gay Catholic man’s story – The Catholic Weekly

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Steven (name changed to protect identity) felt ashamed and isolated by his same-sex attraction. Then he discovered the Catholic faith. Photo: 123RF

I’m 19-years old and first realised I was sexually attracted to men as I hit puberty.

I was uncomfortable with these feelings because I never felt they were the true me.

I was 11 when I discovered internet pornography. I was immediately drawn to it, always yearning to look at more images of men.

Fleeing reality

I compared myself constantly to the images on screen and never felt good enough in my masculine identity. I now see that these images led me further away from reality and deeper into a world of fantasy.

I was often bullied in lower primary school and called gay by other boys who would also tease me in degrading ways. This led me to isolate in upper primary school, so I never connected significantly with any of my peers. I always felt sidelined and different to other males.

At home, my run-to person was my mother. I shared minimally with her because of the shame connected to what was happening within me and around me.

Between being bullied, consuming pornography and feeling emotionally isolated from his father, Steven drifted into depression. Photo: 123RF

Father emotionally unavailable

I perceived my dad to be emotionally unavailable, so I never reached out to him as the significant older male and role model in my life.

I had built up a protective wall against other men over time and had taken on a feminine outlook to help me to deal with challenges that would arise. I now see how this was detrimental to my male development.

For a brief time around age 14, I felt attracted to a girl in high school. I tried to get her to be interested in me, but she rejected me. This hurt me deeply. What limited masculinity I felt at the time was suddenly crushed, making me doubt whether I would ever be good enough to date girls.

Father Timothy Mockaitis and penitent Ethan Alano demonstrate how a confession is conducted. The Sacrament of Confession, as Steven discovered, offers a powerful healing of serious sin, especially addictive sins. Photo: CNS, Chaz Muth

The psychological cost

At 16, my mental health began to deteriorate. I broke down and told my mum about my same-sex attraction. My doctor prescribed me with anti-depressants, but these had a worsening effect on me.

At 17, I began to see a psychiatrist who put me on different medication. I would rarely see him but, when I did, he too wrote out prescriptions for me.

I became heavily medicated. No one ever took the time to consider any deeper issues relating to my past.

A young woman prays with a rosary. Turning to Mary as our Mother and best intercessor after Jesus, especially in the Rosary, can be a game-changer when addressing the spiritual problems we have. Photo: CNS, Martin Villar, Reuters

Christians facing their LGBT issues

I then stumbled across a support group which I attended for a few sessions made up of people who had been in long-term relationships in the LGBT lifestyle. They shared their regrets and how they had had years stripped from their lives, but how Jesus was now bringing them hope.

I continued to be consumed with pornography. I also began to educate myself about the gay community and to engage online in random chats with other gay guys.

At age 18, I returned to the support group. This time, I felt safe enough to truly open up and talk about everything same-sex related. I felt listened to at last. Nothing was excluded from our conversations. I was accepted. I belonged. I had people who honoured me as a person, who didn’t see me as a piece of flesh to be devoured. Our focus was on Jesus, not on each other.

A priest carries the monstrance for adoration during a Catholic youth gathering. Visiting Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament and opening our hearts to Him cannot fail to elicit His healing power in our lives. Photo: CNS, Karen Callaway, Chicago Catholic24, 2019.

Heart-to-heart: finding friendship

Today, some say I have failed to embrace my true self and must have internalised homophobia. I see this as a projection onto me of their own bigoted discomfort with my informed decisions.

I have no problem accepting and facing my same-sex erotic feelings. Even with this full acceptance, I know deep down that this is not the way I was created to be. Even some gay advocates believe no one is ‘born gay’.

I’m developing the deep and meaningful heart-to-heart same-sex and other-sex friendships that I longed for as a child and teenager. I’m beginning to address and move beyond the pain and grief that I’ve dragged around all my life.  Beginnings are slow but real, and good fruit is starting to appear.

Powerful aids: Adoration, the Rosary and Confession

Regular visits to the Blessed Sacrament, meditating on Jesus’ Passion especially through the Rosary, and frequent confession all bring me profound solace.

Regular visits to the Blessed Sacrament, meditating on Jesus’ Passion especially through the Rosary, and frequent confession all bring me profound solace.

I am in touch with other young adults who, like me, feel threatened and scared as a results of laws which stop us from accessing healthy support which help us to rise above the pain and desperation we’ve felt for years.

Some of these other teens, whose lives are also improving, are having again to fight off depression because of threats being made against their personal lives by politicians criminalising therapy and prayer.

The right to therapy

I have a right to get well, to seek out therapy, support, resources, and more access to Jesus’ Presence if I want to. These, often supplied to me through the Catholic Church, help me on my exciting journey into true manhood.

Related

Nonprofit rings in Pride Month with free clothing care packages for transgender Virginians – The Virginian-Pilot

Sarah Noffsinger stands Friday amongst boxes packaged with clothing items ready to ship as part of the Transgender Assistance Program of Virginia’s care package program. The program allows transgender Virginians to shop for clothes and have them shipped at no cost to the recipient. (Jonathon Gruenke/Daily Press)

Hollywood gay power couple – Eminetra.com

Hollywood gay power couple

Source link Hollywood gay power couple